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Redhawk Tribune: Steve Brown

The season will forever be a bunch of what-ifs. All we can do is imagine how successful we would have been and appreciate the memories that we already made.

Redhawk Tribune: Steve BrownRedhawk Tribune: Steve Brown

After everything began, we were constantly refreshing our social media feeds to see if our sport had been canceled. I stayed hopeful until I absolutely knew that track and field would be over, and spent our last meeting trying to reassure my teammates that there was still a chance that we would be able to compete. We learned that the NCAA Championships had been canceled, but our WAC Championships weren't, so we continued to be hopeful.

We figured that track was different from every other sport - it's outside, we don't touch anything, we'll just have to win our race by more than six feet - but soon we came to the realization that our season was complete. Hearing that the season was over was horrible, but at least we had a group of 60 kids with 14 seniors who were all going through the same thing. In my head I was planning one last track meet for us seniors at SU Park, where we could have every senior put on their singlet and spikes just one more time to do their main event while the entire team cheered them on. This dream didn't last long when we realized that we couldn't group up, and more than half of the team had flown home within a few days of the news. I have had time to formally say goodbye to my sport, but I wish I had more time to say goodbye to my teammates, to have one last team bonding experience.

Not knowing that I had experienced my last race when I did, or my last practice is what weighs on me most. In the end, I can run another 400 meters around a track - that is something that my sport has over baseball or softball, as it will be much harder to round up 18 people to play a game of ball than it will be for me to time myself around the track. That is why I will miss my teammates much more than the sport itself. I wish that I had one more bus ride with my teammates or one more night of shenanigans in the hotel. Heck, I even wish we got one more chance to embarrass ourselves on stage for the 2020 lip-sync battle. All of these little things are what I am going to miss most.

Track is an interesting sport because we have an indoor and an outdoor season. We did get to compete this year, which I am thankful for. However, personally, I view indoor as much less significant than outdoor because my main event, the 400m hurdles, is outdoor-only. The last two weeks of training we had after indoor was complete and we all felt great leading into the outdoor season. I was beyond excited to get out and race MY race, but I did not get the chance. I had a really good workout on the day that we slowly began hearing news, and I will look back to that Monday for the rest of my life and know I that was going to do great things this season if I had the chance.

When I take a step back from the whole situation, my senior season of running track meant a lot to me, but it is not the end of the world. Yes, I lost the last few months of my collegiate career to something out of my control, but many people are suffering much more. I am grateful for my health and will continue to be thinking of those who are losing their loved ones during this crazy time.

The season will forever be a bunch of what-ifs. All we can do is imagine how successful we would have been and appreciate the memories that we already made.

Thank you to what the sport has given me for the last nine years of my life and to all the amazing teammates along the way. Lastly, thank you to all of my coaches who taught me much more than just sport. Forever flame on.